Being Your Significant Other's Date To An Event

The difficult part about being in a serious relationship is maintaining your individuality. At least for me. I’m lucky enough to be linked to someone who doesn’t need constant babysitting and manages to fend for himself when we’re out with friends so I never have to worry about neglecting anyone. We both seem independent enough that we won’t get lost in each others’ identity. But then the hard part happens…the part when I have to hang out with his friends when I’m not in the mood to be social. Shit…I have to be in a particular mood to even want to hang out with my friends.

He asked me join him for a friend’s birthday party tonight (a Monday night…at 22 this might’ve been acceptable but in my mid to late 20s, the idea of partying on a Monday night is just so unappealing). And since my stomach has been acting up (too much spicy food and fried stuff), I won’t be drinking. To top it off, the party is at The Standard in Downtown. Nothing wrong with it…except t here’s everything wrong with it. No offense but that just isn’t my scene.

Who made up these relationship rules? What are these terms and conditions and why do we feel obligated to do these things in order to be considered a good boyfriend/girlfriend? Would it be wrong to cancel? Am I selfish because the idea of coming home and vegging out on my new Netflix movie sounds more enticing than accompanying my boyfriend to his friend’s birthday party? Is this where resentment comes into play? I understand compromising and changing in order to have a harmonious relationship but I always thought of that as something different – like, having to get accustomed to sharing a bed or giving up your leftovers. Going to a rooftop party at The Standard on a Monday night? Not quite what I had in mind.

So here’s the compromise: I go. But I drive by myself and leave at midnight. He can either come home with me or stay with his friends. That's fair...right?